I just lost a post

I was inspired to write - finally - after being busy and creatively challenged for a few weeks. I finally had a breakthrough, a topic that made sense and it felt good to write. It took me an hour to write the 5 paragraphs, but they sounded pretty cohesive. Something I'd be proud to publish. AND I LOST IT! My darned wifi crapped out on me and I lost the post!

I'm going to bed now - can't bear to try to re-create it tonight! Boo hoo:-(

Learning to spell

Julian just turned 5 and is in Pre-School. Someting happened a few months back that just seemed to click for him overnight. He started reading and spelling and doing simple addition and subtraction. It was a wonderful surprise!

This morning in the car on the way to school, he was happily talking a bit to himself. I could tell he was working out a spelling problem, but was only half paying attention. "B....R" I could hear him saying over and over. Then he asked what made the sound "Ah". "Mom, what says Ah?" So before I really put 2+2 together I helped him figure out the Ah and proudly he spelled his word: BRA! OK, well, that is a word, but out of the blue, on the way to school at 9am on a Thursday morning, "bra" isn't necessarily a word I'd figure my 5 year old would be trying to figure out. So I asked, trying not to laugh, why was he thinking about bra. "Daddy wears one, with a phone."

He was exactly right! But before you think my hubby is totally weird, Julian was referring to a picture in our office from our most recent cruise where our group was playing a game called Quest. Finding things and wearing them or showing them ... the first woman with two pairs of men's pants, not on the men, first man with a set of dentures, first woman with a tattoo, first man dressed as a woman with all the accessories, etc. That's when the picture was taken and it is a funny picture. But I think I have some 'splainin' to do with my son, huh?!?

Life Lesson: Death

One of the hardest lessons of life is handling death. There's the obvious about death: "there's no good time for it to happen", "it's part of the cycle of life", "time will heal all pain", etc. But really, until you have to go through it, there's so much that you realize you don't know about death and you're not sure you really want to know. But not knowing, of course, is worse.

My father-in-law passed on December 29th of throat cancer. He'd been through treatment once, but it came back aggressively and once diagnosed with the recurrence in November, it didn't take long for the disease to take over the rest of his body. He passed peacefully with his family surrounding him. He's in a better place. The rest of us, however, are in various states of grief, not knowing, confusion. We learned some things but still have questions.

Things I learned:

• How you'll deal with a family member's death isn't generally something you talk about with your future spouse before you get married - you figure it out only once it happens


• Sometimes, you don't deal with death of a family member the same as your spouse


• Sometimes you don't believe the same things as your spouse when it comes to death


• Sometimes you have to give in even when you think it's the wrong thing to do


• Support isn't easy to give when you're angry, but you have to do the best you can


• No one is there to help you when they are a group who are united in their own family issues


• You can get a veteran's ceremony for anyone who served in the military and there is a National Cemetery in Kent, WA


• Once a person dies, you can't ask for any clarification on what they meant to have done with their stuff


• No one really knows how things work once you die and you have to have lots of family meetings to figure it out


• Not all family members will act appropriately during the process


• It can be full of drama and outsiders may not understand or want to be a part of that


• No comment support isn't easy when people are reported to lack common sense


• You can look or sound like a heartless bitch as much as you try not to

But through the experience, I know that I need to understand and figure out way more than I currently know about the process of death for the sake of my own family. So one of my new year resolutions is to study up and get our affairs in order. Then I'll work on my parents to make sure that their affairs are all in order, becasue if they leave a mess, well ... who knows what I'd do!

World Peace

I love my friend Deanne - she especially has an endearing thought about how to end poverty. The government should just print more money!!! Never mind that we try to explain what happens when governments print more money, she clings to the thought that solving that problem should really be that simple.

For me, it's world peace. I just can't understand why it isn't possible. It seems so darned simple, yet it can't be done. If everyone (and I really do mean everyone!!!), would just mind their own business, focus on their own issues, and truly help their neighbor, regardless of color, creed, religion, sex, sexual preference, thoughts, beliefs, etc. that would be a start. If all people would absolutely NEVER be malevolently or purposefully violent towards another human or animal or EVER knowlingly harm another, couldn't that possibly get us much closer to world peace? If everyone accepted that others have thoughts and beliefs that don't necessarily match their own, but didn't worry about what others thought or believed, would that help bring us closer? What is it that makes humans OK with hurting someone else? Why do kids bully each other or laugh when something bad happens to someone else? Why do people steal, rape, kill?

I understand that it's a complex issue, but I really just want it to be simple. Simply love thy fellow human being, NO MATTER WHAT! Everyone, Everywhere! No judgements, no deceptions, no greed, no crazy thinking, no hitting or abusing, no name calling or gossiping, no mean actions, no harming, no violence, no coveting other's property or person, no lying, no manipulating, no cheating, no bullying, no putting down, no hating. It really isn't that hard to do!

McKenna's teacher asked her 2nd grade class to practice Peace over the holiday break and I thought that was really great. A hard concept for some, but something 7 year olds get. Why can't 17 year olds, 27 year olds, 57 year olds, etc.?

I have enough stuff, so I really don't want many things for Christmas, but I really would love World Peace. So here's to practicing Peace over the Holidays.

Give Me A Break

It's late. Its always late when I find time to catch up on personal emails and read favorite blogs. I'm bone tired and I still have tons of things to do before Christmas. Actually, I can't see the end in sight! And I feel guilty for not blogging. Not that my blog is serious entertainment or a "must-read" for many, but because I committed to doing this and I haven't for a while, I feel guilty.

So I'll just say it - I need to give me a break. It's OK to let things be until I feel inspired, or as the case may be at least awake.

So I'll just vicariously live through my friends' blogs! Happy Holidays if I don't happen to be able to get on again for a while.

What I Learned At School Today

I did something today that I wish I did more often - I volunteered at Mac's school for a fun toy-making, science-experiencing project. Rick Hartman (aka Toy Man) spent time at the elementary school working with the 2nd graders making 'gravity people'. The kids had so much fun making their own hammers, then using the hammers to build their toys. Then they spent time experimenting on how to make their 'people' move using gravity, wind, etc. There was an artistic aspect for those who like that and all the kids were really creative in decorating their toys (Mac made basketballs and hoops for hers).

But what I learned is that I really like to help out my kids and their friends with their projects. I smile at their creativity, at they way they get into the project and really try to apply their learning. I don't remember ever being that way. I love the way they get excited when things come together, as if by magic. Each one has such great ideas and they love to share with their friends, neighbors and teachers. It's easy to offer compliments to everyone - they all give their 100% and they have no expectations. And they visibly feel good when they get compliments.

So I keep moving forward with my plans to work fewer hours and spend more time with the kids, taking time to volunteer at their schools and spending time learning about what they are learning. I never thought I'd want to do that, but it really is.

And actually I did learn something very cool - I can balance 6 nails on one - if you don't believe me just ask me to show you - you too will be amazed!

On Being a Mom (I)

This little ditty really says a lot about being a mom- I'll let her tell it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxT5NwQUtVM
Hope it makes you smile :-)