I Just Like To Do It

I admit it. I like to DO. I also like to write. But for some reason I don't like to write about doing. It's anticlimactic.

If I write about what I’m about to do, it’s pressure and I feel the need to buck authority, even though I’m the authority.  It somehow signals that now I have to do this thing. It then loses its draw.

If I write about it after I do, then it seems self-serving, boasting, me-centered and begs the questions “WTH do they care about that?” or “So what?”

It just all feels a little neurotic … not unlike my life actually.

But since September has come to a close and I actually did use some of the advice culled from my magazine reading, I’ll offer the brief synopsis of my take-aways from last month so I can catch up with this month already.

From O, The Oprah Magazine:

I was happy to be validated that I have confidence, am assertive and use my personal power. I use my body to think, putting myself in power poses which lead me to make bigger, riskier decisions, be physically strong, have a high tolerance for pain and see the opportunities around me. I know when to “play high” and when to “play low”.  So for those who’ve had to endure my feet-on-the-desk moments – that was strategic!

Was satisfied that I had an OK ECO IQ – I already use the dishwasher more than washing by hand (duh!), I drink beverages mostly out of aluminum cans and hardly out of glass bottles, I switched from buying paper books to adding e-books to my new Nook that I got for Christmas from my hubby and I don’t wash my car – ever - so I’m super Eco Star there.   However, things to improve on: use plastic wrap instead of aluminum foil (just don’t use a lot), change bulbs to LED bulbs over CFL’s and don’t use the treadmill as often.  OK, that last one not really but I ‘could’ walk outside instead.  That would lead to drastically reduced exercise – I would never actually go for a walk in the cold, rainy weather we live in.
I stopped fitting my life to my work and started fitting my work to my life.  It’s a work in progress to go from corporate exec to entrepreneur, but I know it’s the right thing for me and for my family.

Want to try Dr Oz’ Cornmeal-Crusted Tofu with Mashed Sweet Potatoes.  Not a tofu fan, but want to eat better.  I will also take a look at the blog 100daysofrealfood.com to see if I can get help.

From BH&G:

I used to fold my bras in a drawer.  I now “file” them to keep them in better shape.  Who knew?!?

I bought a new shade of nail polish for the fall and did my own pedicure.  Essie’s “Sexy Divide” – decidedly purple! Color: Fab.  Pedicure: most definitely need professional help.

Want to try to make Sweet Potato Soup with Curried Cheese Crisps for dinner.  Hmmm … I sense a pattern and craving for sweet potatoes!

New after school schedule and habits: I moved my work station to the dining room table and now the kids both join me when they get home and have a quick snack.  We all do homework together, read and get tomorrow’s stuff done.  It all gets done faster, they feel that they have help and know that they have the rest of the evening to themselves or at least won’t have to do homework after sports when they are tired.  And I can spend quality time with them and they are learning more.  This is a first since our daughter was born 11 years ago.  Makes my decision to have a home office worth it!

It was National Yoga Month and I was able to get a fabulous private session in at home with Karen from Phyzz Yoga.  I HAVE to find a way to do that more often!!

From Prevention:

I.Knew. It! – I can blame my increase in waist size over the years on my pelvis.  Presumable the pelvis keeps growing after the rest of the skeleton stops and increases waist size.  Ha – Not My Fault! (well, that felt good for a moment… now back to reality – it is my fault).

From Self:

“Au revoir to office ass” (their title, not mine!) – 120 moves 3 times a week and supposedly my butt will be perky.  Not to share TMI, but nothing I’ve ever had has been *perky*.  Testing starting now …

Again a greening makeover – less food waste.  Practicing a little “Kaizen”, cooking portions sizes we’ll eat and not more, following shopping list and decreasing impulse buying, only buying what we need for the week.  Supposedly I can save up to $900 per year this way.  Works for me!

Getting my braniac on – never thought I’d be one to play online games, but yes, I downloaded the Words With Friends app to improve my brain power and had three games going this month.  Yeah – lost all three games, but was close on 2 of them.  Still good to have a little brain stimulation and friendly competition.  Taking on people we know bolsters talking and bonding, leaving us more fulfilled.  Amen to that!  Thanks Linda, Misty and Dana for playing with me.

Better parenting - I finally have time in the morning to fix a better breakfast for the kids.  My daughter will now request a "terry bagel" (named for a friend who introduced us to this little piece of heaven on our camping trips) or a scramble.  Egg, turkey or canadian bacon, veggies, some cheese ... Waaayyyy better than daily routine of mini pancakes in the microwave with syrup (even if it was sugar free). Feeling a little less guilty.

3 steps forward 1 step back – sleep.  Was supposed to get more sleep by working from home … not so much.  Have more on my mind, more on my task list and less help this month, so the workday ends between 12:30a and 2a and alarm clock goes off at 6:55a.  I wouldn’t call after 10pm of you really want a pleasant conversation.  Snarky is what you’ll get at that time.

I also wanted to dance more this month, especially with the kids.  And I wanted to practice holding plank so I could do it for three minutes straight.  I think I’m still at about 30 seconds.

The 5-year plan – so this will be done in baby steps, ‘cause it asks me to “rip up my to-do list”, start dreaming and dare to make those dreams a reality.  Anyone who knows me knows that to not have a to-do list is just not going to happen.  I live and breathe the to-do list.  I really want to do away with them, I do, but when I try, I make even more lists.  On the phone, the computer, several paper versions by week, day, hour and sometimes minutes.   But I do want to live a more meaningful and fulfilled life so I did put a few things on my TaskPro list to make that happen.  Next month, when I have a little more time (ha!), I will create my vision board and write down goals that will allow me to savor the process of achieving, not just the achievement of it. And this mini goal setting is actually the key to getting the big goals checked off the list, so I guess I’m on my way!  I like the last page of this mag for its inspiration:

“No one who has achieved greatness got there by following an easy path laid out by others.  She did it by creating he own vision and striving to achieve, then surpass it.  Now that the lazy days of summer are behind, it’s time to renew focus.  Think of what you want to accomplish, and take a step toward it every day.  You are standing on the brink of something spectacular.”

And that’s what I’m counting on!!

Some Drama, Big Reward

After days of hand-wringing, negotiating over song choices, looking for a costume (thankfully already appropriate in the mind of the wearer) - the big "Try Out" day came and McKenna made the Syre Elementary Talent Show!!

She settled on the Keke Palmer song "It's My Turn Now" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vao13M-NqJ8 (thanks K for steering both of us to a great alternative to Beyonce!), and a costume that includes everyday wear - a black plain t-shirt, red/black/white plaid skort and red tights.

This whole experience has been a bit dramatic and all for 1.5 minutes of 'fame'. She originally wanted to dance with her best friend to the Beyonce song "Irreplaceable" (see post below). When her friend backed out because her Mom encouraged her to focus on the ice skating dance routine and competition coming her way, McKenna was decidedly bummed. But she is persistent when she wants to do something and so she tried to recruit other friends, even announcing at one point that she was going to do a routine with her worst enemy - that's how badly she wanted to get in the talent show. When I pointed out that doing things with others would require compromise on songs, dance moves and practice time that was already disastrously short, she agreed that this year would be the year for her to do this on her own.

So a song was picked, the computer set to the YouTube video, the lyrics printed out, a CD made and the karaoke machine set up in the living room with space to dance and the speakers to hear it well. Practices were morning, noon and night ... before and after school and even her best friend helped her practice during recess. She learned the lyrics quickly and was able to belt out the whole thing on her own in just a couple of days. The dance moves came naturally and with the help of her entertainer dad, a performance was born.

The night before the try outs, her dad was working late and wasn't able to practice with her and motivate her most energetic self. She needs me for many things, but this time she really wanted and needed her dad. So fear and doubt set in and in a tearful confession she told me that she wasn't going to participate in the try outs. At this point, the pragmatic me set in and reminded her of all she accomplished in such short time, and of the time we've all put into helping her out. Of course I also tried to work in some confidence building and pumping up her self-esteem and after 15 minutes of discussion, she agreed to still consider the possibility. Next morning all was good and Myron promised he'd be there to cheer her on.

As luck would have it, one of his really good client's called for a gig that would not allow him to attend the try outs. I would have to be the one to tell her when I picked her up and walked her to the gym. I would rather have faced a pack of rabid wolves than have to tell her that bad news - I knew the horrible disappointment that she was going to be feeling. And I was afraid I wouldn't sound as empathetic as I would need to because Myron's work schedule also really messed up a super busy and stressful family schedule - Mac's POM class directly after try outs, Julian's baseball practice at 5 and then a Birds & Bees class for Myron and I that evening back at the school. Now all of this squarely on my shoulders. I put on my Supermom uniform and set off to do what I had to do (feeling guilty to be leaving work early with a pile of deadline projects on my desk and having to cancel my participation in the Finance Committee's regularly scheduled meeting).

I did manage to pick up Julian, stop at home for the costume, camera, water bottles, snacks and music, make it to the school on time to take her to the gym, call Myron on the cell and have her talk to him for a pep talk and turn the cell off to ward off last minute work calls. I had the camera at the ready for the big moment. She was nervous but sat with the rest of the girls and boys, listened to the directions and we watched a few people go through their try outs before Mac's name was finally called. She bravely gave them her music and then came over the me, crouched down and I heard those words: "Mom, I can't do this. I am too afraid. I really don't think I can do this." The teacher was calling for her to start and I had to come up with something to say. I reminded her that she worked really hard and that she was sure to make it if she did her best. That she would definitely NOT make it if she didn't try and to think of her dad being at the back of the room doing this with her. I also told her to do the Sharpay trick (High Shool Musical) which made her smile. She took a deep breath and walk to the middle of the gym. The music started, she struck her pose and went for it! She didn't freeze, she sang 'loud and proud" and when they thanked her the relief and pride was visible, SHE DID IT!!

I prompted her to ask the teacher when she would find out if she'd made it and she was told on the spot "Congratulations! You made it!" She was practically jumping out of her skin with excitement. And of course I was so proud of her, too. I know how much this will help her confidence. So look for video to be posted around May 30th to see how things actually turn out. I'm sure there will be more afraid moments in the next couple of weeks, but not nearly as strong. She set a goal, worked hard to make it good, followed through and achieved what she wanted. It's all good from here, right?!?